Are you planning to recite a groom's speech during your wedding reception? 

Great! Now the real question is, how exactly do you write one? 

As a wedding vow and speech writer, I have worked with many grooms to ghostwrite their wedding speeches.

So here is my guide for you to follow so you can create a groom’s speech that you feel confident delivering on the big day. 

Tip #1: Determine the Goal of Your Speech

There are many different directions you can take with a groom’s speech. Before you put pen to paper, decide what direction you want to take. 

Here are various goals you can achieve through a groom’s toast:

• Thank and welcome guests

• Thank a few key and influential people 

• Honor loved ones who have passed

• Pay tribute to your new spouse

• Entertain guests

 Which of these ideas is a goal you want to achieve with your speech? Most likely, you’ll want to include more than one of these concepts. You may even want to touch on all of them throughout your speech.  

You don’t have to limit yourself. Just make sure the speech is thoughtful in its intention and focused on communicating your key points so that your delivery feels most impactful. 

Tip #2: Organize your Speech into Sections 

Now that you have your ideas, it’s time to organize those thoughts.

The best way to do this is by creating an outline for your wedding speech. 

Here’s the outline I’d recommend you follow for your groom’s speech:

• Brief introduction 

• Welcome and thank guests

• Thank anyone who deserves a special mention (parents, grandparents, or anyone who has been influential in your life and making your wedding day happen)

• Story about your journey to getting to this moment

• A few words about your new spouse

• Your wish for guests

• Close with a toast 

Tip #3: Keep the Thank Yous Succicent

One of the main purposes of your groom’s speech is to thank guests. While this is vital, don’t let the thank you section become so verbose that you lose the guests’ attention.

For example, if you mention more than two to four specific people, your thank you list will be so long that you won’t achieve that level of impact that you’re striving for.

Instead, focus on the most important people.

For anyone else who you’d like to thank but doesn’t make the cut for the speech, consider writing them personal thank you notes and distribute these either at the rehearsal dinner or after your honeymoon. 

I recommend organizing the thank you section of your speech into two sections:

1. A general thank you to all guests

2. A specific thank you honoring key individuals 

Example of a General Thank You:

My new spouse and I would like to thank everyone for traveling from all over the country to celebrate with us today. Your presence makes this moment more special. 

Example of a Specific Thank You: 

We’d especially like to thank both of our parents. 

To my mom and dad, Sheila and Donny. You’ve always encouraged me to chase my dreams and if it weren’t for your constant encouragement, I wouldn’t be living out my greatest dream today.

And to my in-laws, Jenny and Dave. Thank you for welcoming me so warmly into your family and for raising the love of my life. I promise to show her as much admiration, support, and love that you two always have. 

Tip #4: Balance Humor with Sentiment

Everyone appreciates a funny wedding speech. But make sure you balance that humor with the sentiment of the moment too.

You can keep guests intrigued and your speech interesting by bouncing back and forth between playful energy and a more sentimental tone. 

To do this, have a few jokes interspersed within serious sections. 

For example, after you recite a light-hearted line or a self-deprecating joke, circle back to a serious tone where you share something more heartfelt. 

Tip #5: Share a Story About Your Relationship

The number one way to capture guests is through storytelling so consider including a story within your groom’s speech.

Choose an anecdote that will show some insight into your love story but can also be tied back to the present moment of your wedding day.

Example:

When I showed up at Bar Logan for our first date, I was prepared for good drinks, decent food, and terrible karaoke filling the air between us…but I could never have been prepared to meet such a gorgeous woman who was as funny as she was smart, as strong as she was vulnerable, and as sweet as she was sassy.

Now I’m proud to say that for the rest of my life, I get to call that wonderful woman my wife. 

Tip #6: Work with a Speech Writer

To ensure you include everything that’s important to you and your new spouse within your groom’s speech, consider help. 

As a speech writer, I work with grooms to gather all the necessary information needed to write a speech that will make your guests feel both entertained and honored to attend your wedding.

Plus, getting married is nerve-wracking enough. You don’t need to add anything else to your plate that will cause you to be anxious on your wedding day. 

Get in touch to see how I can help.

Tip #7: Understand the Logistics

Common questions I receive for a groom’s speech are things like, “How long should my groom’s speech be?” And, “When do I recite my groom’s speech?”

So here are your answers to these popular questions:

• Keep your speech impactful and to the point. The best way to achieve this is to not speak for too long. Reciting a 1 - 3 minute speech is ideal.

• The groom’s speech is often recited after the ceremony and before dinner. If you’re having other guests give speeches, your speech should be first. This is because you’re a host of the event and so it makes sense for you to officially welcome and thank guests before others give their toasts.

Tip #8: Practice Reciting Your Speech Out Loud

Writing your groom’s speech is a huge task but to really leave a positive impression, practice your delivery.

Here are my top public speaking tips to keep in mind:

• Speak loudly and slowly

• Use a microphone

• Don’t try to memorize your speech and don’t read it from your phone. Instead, print a copy of your speech and read from the paper while making natural eye contact throughout your delivery. 

• Keep hand gestures to a minimum 

• If you mess up a line, don’t apologize. This will only call attention to a moment that, otherwise, most of your guests may not have even noticed. 

• Smile at appropriate lines. This will add a natural inflection to your delivery. 

Your presence at the mic combined with the words you write is what will leave a lasting impression on guests.