Are you looking to write a wedding day letter to your bride? It can be overwhelming to start this wedding day task, especially if you’re also writing custom wedding vows.

There are so many questions to consider. What’s the difference between vows and a letter? What do you include in a wedding day letter? Is there a structure to follow? Are there any details to exclude? How long should the letter be?

As a professional wedding vow writer, I’ll cover all of these questions and more through this wedding day letter writing guide for your bride. 

How is a wedding day letter different than wedding vows?

Your vows should stand the test of time and focus on your love both now and in the future. The wedding day letter can be more anecdotal and should include references to your relationship to date and the wedding day itself. 

Here is a quick list you can reference to differentiate your custom vows from your wedding day letter:

Vows Should Include:

• Specific promises 

• A tone that is mostly serious and sentimental with a dash of humor 

• Content that will stand the test of time 

Wedding Day Letter Should Include:

• References to how you feel now that your wedding day is finally here

• Anecdotal details from milestone moments in your relationship that led you to this day

• Personal details that you may not feel comfortable publicly sharing within your vows 

Why should I write a wedding day letter to my bride?

There are various reasons that couples choose to write a wedding day letter to their future spouse.

• If you don’t feel comfortable sharing your emotions during personal vows, you can privately share these feelings through a letter.

• The letter is a sentimental and romantic keepsake from the day.

• Your letter can accompany any gift you give your bride on the morning of your wedding

• If you have a videographer, they may have you read the letter out loud so they can use the audio for your highlight video.

• Letters are something to exchange and read during your first look.

How long should a wedding day letter be?

While vows are typically 1 - 5 minutes in speaking length but your wedding day letter can be longer.

I recommend sticking to one page.

And remember, a handwritten letter is more personal and romantic than a typed letter. 

What’s an outline or structure I can follow for the letter?

Address your bride:

Start with a simple introduction. Since this letter will be read privately, unlike vows, feel free to use any nicknames within the introduction that you otherwise might be too embarrassed to say in front of your guests. 

Express how you feel on your wedding day: 

The wedding day letter should feel timely so reference the day. How are you feeling now that the big day is finally here? What thoughts are running through your head when you think of seeing your bride for the first time? 

Here are some samples you can reference for this part of the letter:

• After years of dating and months of planning, I can’t believe our wedding day is actually here. I’m restlessly excited and can’t wait to finally say I do to you, the great love of my life.

• I have no idea what your dress looks like or what hairstyle you finally settled on after the endless hours you spent scrolling through Pinterest but I know with certainty that you will look gorgeous and I will forever remember the way you look for the rest of our lives. 

Communicate the story of your relationship:

How did you two meet? It doesn’t matter how many years a couple has been together, it’s always fun to retell the “how we met” story. 

Recounting your meeting story provides a full circle moment since we’re going from the moment you first met to your wedding day. 

Example: 

• I’ll never forget missing the F train and having to wait nearly 30 minutes to catch the next one. I thought it was going to be the worst moment of my day, making me late for work, late for that important meeting, and late to hand in my presentation. But missing that train was not only the best moment of that day, but it has also been the best thing that has happened to me since then because it brought me to you. So really, it was perfect timing.

• I didn’t want to go out that Friday night. My buddies had to practically drag me out of my apartment but I’m so grateful I didn’t stay at home that night and instead found myself at Mike’s Pub where I caught eyes with the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. I barely had the nerve to speak to you but I knew I had already almost missed one opportunity that night by not going out, I couldn’t miss this one….the one that would forever change my life: meeting you.

Describe the reasons you love her: 

What is it about your bride that makes you excited to marry her? List out a few reasons. Unlike with your vows, you can get very anecdotal in the letter through storytelling.

For example, if her generous heart is one of the qualities you admire in her, recount the story of when she invited you to volunteer at the soup kitchen with her for your second date. 

Or perhaps you love her laugh. Detail out some of the more memorable experiences together that got you both laughing. 

The idea is not just to list words that describe her personality but rather to relive warm memories from your relationship that illustrate her character. 

End with a wedding day related last line:  

While a classic “I love you” is a sweet way to end your wedding day letter, try to also include some sort of specific nod to the day.

Examples:

• I love you and I can’t wait to see you walk down the aisle.

• Here’s to our final moments as a fiance and to our new beginning of forever.

• I love you, my bride.

• Here’s to the first day of the rest of our lives together, my love. 

Need help writing your wedding day letter to your bride?

As a vow expert, I work with couples to write heartfelt and custom vows but I can also work with you to write that special wedding day letter. 

To learn more about how we can collaborate, contact Wedding Words now.